My hair was awesome. During high school I sported a fantastic business up front, party in the back mullet. I wore it with pride as if the length of my hair was somehow proportionate to the length of my….. Mine fell to the center of my back and was always in perfect form. The all-one-length grunge look that was emerging disgusted me. I had to blow dry and brush it methodically every morning, it took an extra 20 min or so to get ready for school, but I loved my hair. To those women who chop off their hair and say “You have no idea how much work it is to keep hair that long” I say “Yes, I absolutely do, and it is worth every second.”
The mullet has gotten a bad rap but I’m sure it will be back. It now seems to go hand in hand with the trailer trash, but no one was saying that when Metallica wore them (or maybe they did). If people actually brought back bell bottoms, I’m sure the mullets will get another run….I’m waiting patiently, but at the rate I’m losing hair, I don’t think I’m going to make it.
My wife and I dated right after high school and she hated my hair from day one. (She says that, but I was a black leather jacket wearing, AC/DC playing, red Trans Am driving, punk that she ended up marrying. So I think she was a closet mullet freak.) Compound that with the fact that I was going to attend a very conservative University, and the hair had to go.
I was adorned with those luscious locks for four years and was sick at the prospect of cutting them. So I took it a step at a time. I went to a hairdresser and had her cut one to two inches a week for the several weeks leading up to my departure to college. The one thing I did get out of the deal was an agreement I made with my then girlfriend, now wife. I cut my hair because that is what she wanted; so she had to agree not to cut her hair, because that is what I wanted. Her hair was and is still quite long and very sexy. The agreement: the day she cuts her hair is the day I stop cutting mine. If she wants the short and sassy look, she knows that I will bring back my mullet and wear it with authority.
Aside: Skiing just isn’t the same when you don’t have 14” of hair pushed out the back of your Denver Broncos baseball cap. As you dart down the hill, it gets pulled back by the wind creating a might flag of speed and grace.
If you are unfamiliar with the life and times of the Mullet clad, check out the classifications on this site. It is hilarious.
7 comments:
The real question, is did you carry a comb in your back pocket during this time? Perhaps did you drive a van with no back windows?
I really hope that mullets do not come back. You really "liked" your hair like that? Hey, maybe it looked good on you...
I'm sure he looked just as goofy, if not more goofy, as all the other imbred mullet-wearing rednecks out there. I for one sported a "Tail" for a couple of years of high school, but that was a few years before this pups time.
Come back Meatwad. We miss you.
Ya. I agree with TNO. You must come back and enlighten us further.
The Betty Ford clinic puts on the 3 week program...so he'll be back in a little bit.
Oh. Sorry, I didn't realize. Hey Meatwad, when you get out, drinks are on me bub.
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